I'll admit for sometime I have wanted to live my life as someone else, go after a different glory. I not only believe but I know its because of this reason that my life has been so disasterous so wrong! I have been wanting to be that girl who is loved, hip, cherished, wanted, wanted to do those things that brought fame superficially. and this whole time i have been living my own life timidly is messed up and it looks a hot mess even in my character and my attitude. Ive genuinely produced nothing that came from me. only disaster. but as I was driving in the car this morning. I thought "your seeking all this stuff and wanna be this thing/person but are you seeking you really? like when I thought about it it was crazy, was I seeking me who i really was and acting as the person God created? what about me the things that I have? who I am really. Its crazy 'cause I was thinking like when I really seek myself. see me as me. delve into my life as messed up as it is. thats when I really can come into who I am. and I got a glimpse of how God sees me the person who I am really 'sposed to be. That was nice! then after that I got to thinkin... How many things do we miss out on because we dont embrace ourselves? we want to be somebody else and have what they have, I'm sure I have missed out on so many things in my own life because ive sought after a lifestyle. but I saw that my life was in Christ always has been and my boldness is in Him, so when you approach people your not timid but you come with power. power to be you cuz your whole. your not diminished not broken. so all my looking Ive created nothing. but in seeking God putting Him first, I not only have a predestined wonderful lifestyle but I have a Bold character. I'm startin to like me the me in God that God truly created and i will no longer miss out on my blessings but in my productivity get the blessings and the life that God has designed specifically for me. I Love It!!!
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